A Bump in the Road

Yesterday was a busy day for me.  As you know if you read my blog, I have been looking for a job for several months and trying to get started on some classes at the local community college.  I discovered last week that there is a prerequisite for one of the Education Technology classes that I need to take.  It is Introduction to Computers.  Because of my financial situation I can only take 2 classes at a time and, while the intro class is required at the college, the hours for it won't count toward my teaching license.  I decided that I would pay $25 to take a test on the class.  If I made an 80 or better, I would have received credit for the class and wouldn't have to take it this fall.  While I am very comfortable with a computer, my skills in Excel fell short of the 80 that I needed.  I knew this before I got the official word from the instructor.  Before I left campus yesterday, I stopped into the success center to find out how the online classes that I'm taking this fall will work.  I'm from the old school of showing up to a classroom and sitting in a desk with an instructor in front of me, so I had no idea how to "show up" for the online class.  The man in the success center was just what I needed.  He seemed to be a little bit older than me and was very helpful.  I was of course stressed about the test.  He took time to pull the test up for me, and he asked me to show him what I didn't know how to do in the spreadsheet.  He asked me a couple of questions and then I went to the very spot that I couldn't find during the test.  He smiled.  I said, "Crap!"  He laughed.  I guess that I could have done better if I had just taken a little more time instead of getting frustrated during the test.  You see, everything that I needed was there, but I couldn't see the trees for the forest.  Our conversation went from the test to God's plan for our lives.  He talked about how all of us are going to die one day and that there was more to life than money.  He talked about Noah.  He reminded me that Noah started building the ark long before it rained.  He preached to the people and warned them but only his family joined him on the ark.  We laughed because we decided that his kids probably thought he was crazy too, but they didn't know where there next meal would come from if they didn't go with him.....if you have a teenager you know what I mean!  He said that if you looked at the number of people Noah convinced to get on the ark with him, you might say that he wasn't successful.  But, he said that God knew Noah's heart and God knew how hard Noah had worked.  Noah was successful in God's eyes!  So, I left school a little less frustrated and a whole lot more satisfied because of a stranger that God put in my path.  I didn't pass the test yesterday, but I know that God knows my heart, and He is more concerned with my effort than my grade.  Once again I wanted to take a shortcut and hurry things along.  I seem to do this more since I turned 40.  I look back at my first 40 years and want to accomplish so much more in my next 40.  I also am more aware of the fact that we aren't promised tomorrow and that I may have much less than 40 years left.  I struggled last night with how my failure was going to effect my progress in reaching my goal.  I woke up this morning with a fresh perspective and am reminded that the good stuff is in the journey, not the goal.  So, I'm taking a deep breath, changing my schedule, and I'm waiting with great expectations for the next step on my journey:)